Friday, 15 November 2019

The Things We Do For Love - Guest Post

#F4Thought The Things We Do For Love - Guest Post by PJA Woode

At the risk of sounding repetitive, I am starting off this post in a somewhat similar vein to my last one.  So here goes: I suspect that most of the other posts about the things people do for love are all about the ways others have gone that extra mile to please/excite/satisfy/amuse their lover.  But for me, it is the opposite.
I’ve been with my partner for well over thirty years and we get on really well. We share passions
and interest, have the same values, enjoy each other’s company and have fun together.  We are
still very much in love (corny, I know, but true).

But, there has to be a but, doesn’t there?

And the but is sex.  When we started out we had a great sex life.  We enjoyed lots of different positions,
experimented with toys, tied each other up with the most magnificent leather ankle and wrist restraints,
watched porn together and it was marvellous.

However, over the years the menu has become ever more restrictive.  And I sense that early burst of
exuberant sexuality was more me than my partner  Watching porn and the bondage gear were the first
to go, then the toys went, and the positions narrowed to a couple and now pretty much to just one.

On the positive side, we are still having regular sex once or twice a week, and that’s grand - I know of
many couples our age who have totally given up.  

So, what I do for love is to live with this very restrictive and very bland sexual diet.  I do my best to
make sure my partner always has a good orgasm, and I am pretty sure she always does.  I hold off
until she has come; I pretty much come second every time. And if I don’t come - well, you will have
to read my last post about that.  My partner repeatedly tells me that she is more than satisfied and
feels fulfilled sexually. And because I love her that is just fine. with me.

But I do feel rather empty and that a wonderful, naughty, edgy, rich, exciting sexuality that is the
real me has been buried.

However, there are two important things to say in conclusion as I really don’t want readers to think
I’m a sad old, moany, old thing.  First, I do see a glimmer of hope and a few things have happened
recently that have broken the sexual rut. Second, I am writing this post and can enjoy my rich sexuality
with some wonderful people out here in this fabulous community of which I increasingly feel part
and which nourishes and sustains me.



  1. That truly is a sacrifice for love, and I am glad you can see a silver lining in your 'cloud'.

    You're also right that all over the land/world others are putting up with less than they want sexually or less than they were able to have before.

    I'm so glad your friends/those you follow in the blogisphere are helping you fill the gaps.

    1. Thank you - and yes, my like-minded Twitter friends allow me to breathe. And I can't thank them enough

  2. I think whatever broke the "sexual rut" you should try and capitalise on it - and wish u well ;-)

  3. I hope the glimmer turns into a sunrise. Having said that, we all have our needs and desires. That doesn't mean our partner shares them. I'm not trying to give advice that may not be wanted, though I hope your partner knows that your own desires have remained the same. That may not change anything, but it's honest. Then again, this comes from someone who has flunked in relationships again and again. Wish you the best!

  4. Thank you for this very thoughtful and profound comment - there's a lot to hang on to in what you have said. Appreciate this a lot.

  5. Thank you for this very thoughtful and profound comment - there's a lot to hang on to in what you have said. Appreciate this a lot.



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